Sammy’s story: how our ‘MenD’ programme mended his life
Posted on September 15, 2018 by Iosis
Things started to change for Sammy in prison. There for the first time for a seven-month term, it gave him a huge wake-up call. Luckily, hisprobation officer suggested doing a men’s programme at Iosis – a step that has changed his life.
Sammy has just completed MenD, which is an eight-week, one-on-one therapeutic programme. He’s so stoked with the difference it’s made to his and his family’s lives that he and his partner are now on the waiting list for couples counselling.
“There’s no question that without this programme I would have re-offended by now,” says Sammy. “In the past, my way was to fix things with my hands. If someone upset me or made me angry I did something about it. Now things are different. Alfred (Sammy’s Iosis mentor) has given me the tools to deal with things differently and I use them every day.”
“Over the last eight weeks, I met with Alfred and he blew my mind. I started to take notes so I wouldn’t forget and I refer to them every day. As soon as I leave, I start practising what Alfred has taught me – he is TOO good! – and it has become an important part of my everyday life.
For example, the 10:90 rule – when I get angry, I focus on the 90% I can control myself. The other 10%, which is coming from others and I can’t control, I leave. I’ve also learnt the five love languages, to take responsibility for my actions, as well as acceptance and moving on.”
Alfred, Sammy’s facilitator says he is one of many who have noticed the change in Sammy since he started the MenD programme. “He was a diligent student who made great progress during the programme.”
Sammy and his partner are currently expecting another baby. “I used to talk to my partner about what I’d learned,” says Sammy. “Now I just put it into practice and she’s seeing it through my behaviour change – now she’s asking me questions.”